PLEA gratefully acknowledges our primary core funder the Law Foundation of Saskatchewan for their continuing and generous support of our organization.
Following a sexual assault, your first concern may be for your own safety. Once you are out of immediate danger, you may want to call someone for support.
There are a number of people or agencies that you can contact for help. This could be a friend or family member or a crisis line. You can contact a victim service unit or agency or a sexual assault centre. Most sexual assault centres have 24-hour support lines. The front of your SaskTel phone book has contact information for abuse help lines, shelters and counselling and support services in your area. You can also go to sk.211.ca to find information on supports available in your area.
Fact: No other crime victim is looked upon with the same degree of suspicion and doubt as a victim of sexual assault. Although there are numerous reasons why society has cast blame on the victims of sexual assault, a major reason found in studies is that of a feeling of self-protection. Others may believe that the victim was responsible because they put themselves in an unsafe position. This is a coping mechanism that makes others feel safer because they believe that they would not put themselves in such a position. The truth is, however, that no victim is responsible for a crime committed against them.
There is no normal reaction after you have been sexually assaulted. Every person reacts with a different combination of symptoms and at a different rate of time. Symptoms may be experienced for a short or long time. Just remember that what you feel is real, and it is not your fault.
You may feel:
Physically, you may have:
You may experience:
These symptoms are referred to as Rape Trauma Syndrome and for some can last for a very long time. You may find it hard to get out of bed, leave the house, carry on with normal day-to-day activities or go to work. Some survivors try to cope by drinking, using drugs or overusing prescription medications. It is best to stay away from drugs and alcohol during your recovery as these substances can:
Fact: Sexual assault can have serious and long-term effects on a person’s health and well-being.
If you have experienced sexual violence, you may be entitled to up to 18 weeks leave from work. You can use this time to do things like going to see a doctor, counsellor or a victim services agency for help. This leave can also be used to relocate or to participate in a court case about the incident.
One of the most important things for survivors of sexual assault is to know that they are not alone and that there is help available. Every survivor is unique and will need the help that is right for them. Professional counselling, support groups, friends and family can all play a part in assisting a survivor in the aftermath of an assault.
Self-care is also very important for survivors. Survivors struggling with feelings like shame and worthlessness can find it very difficult to take good care of themselves. However, self-care can be a vital part of the healing process.
What self-care looks like will be different for each person. Self-care means looking after your physical and emotional needs. It can be as simple as eating nutritious foods and getting enough sleep. It can be as involved as developing supportive relationships and finding meaningful ways to spend your time.
If you have experienced sexual violence, you may be able to end a lease early if the continuation of the tenancy could pose a safety risk. Victims must obtain a certificate from the Victims Services Branch. This then allows them to end a fixed term tenancy by giving 28 days’ notice to the landlord. For more information, contact Victim Services toll free at 1-888-286-6664.
Sexual assault of someone close can impact family and friends as well. You may experience many of the same symptoms as the survivor. It is important to practice good self-care and perhaps seek professional help or talk to a friend. This can assist you in dealing with any trauma symptoms and in providing support for the survivor.
Having information about responses to sexual assault can help you normalize them for the survivor. If you are going to be a support person for the survivor, it is important to consistently be there for them. Let them know that you are willing to actively support and listen to them. If the survivor wishes to talk about the sexual assault, believe them and accept what happened in a non-judgmental way. Do not push them to speak about it. Let them know that any reaction that allowed survival was the right thing to do.
Allow the survivor to make their own decisions. During the assault, power was taken from them. Regaining control of their lives is an important aspect of healing. This could include allowing them to decide whether or not they want to report to the police. Remember that every survivor will be unique in their reactions and respect their decisions about what they most need to heal.
Offer practical support. This might involve accompanying them to appointments or walking with them to the corner store.
Touching and sexual intimacy may be very difficult for a survivor. Allow them to decide what kinds of physical contact they are comfortable with. Showing affection in non-physical ways is important.
Encourage them to seek medical care and counselling. Accompany them if they wish.
Continue to relate to them as more than just a survivor. Remember, this is your friend, partner, sibling, parent or someone else you care about.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
It wasn’t your fault.
You survived – so you did the right thing.
Thank you for telling me.
I’m always here if you want to talk.
Can I do anything for you?
PLEA offers free online training on preventing and addressing workplace harassment.